selfishness

In life, I am learning and I am learned:
I have come to realize that when the stresses of work and life and home become abundant, i release those stresses via very selfish and thoughtless ways.
the releasing not only hurts my, but others around me. perhaps by acknowledging this - freedom of practises long created for by myself for stress relief will stop controlling me.

i know i am vague, but embarrassments have made me realize this -
i am a better person - i am loved by a creator - i am blessed to be loved by a wife - i am blessed to love my children and recieve love from them - i have a decent paying job (although i think i am worth more) - i have a roof over my head - i have two vehicles, one is paid for and and one is almost paid for -
i am responsible for my decisions at all times - regardless.

that is the thing i need to be coherant of at all times. my decisions are either going to help people or hurt people, including myself.

down i come

okay,
ran a marathon in April - did it in 4 hours 3 mintues and 40 some seconds... way better than i thought. my friend Brian Wendt helped me out a ton!

since 1 and half years ago i have lost about 20 pounds... i am now continually under 190, about 187 all the time - i did hit my magic goal number of 185 the other day - that was really cool.

-i have a small addiction to running, that is all i can tell you - i feel better about myself, i have more energy. it is well.

work is a bitch... thinking about becoming a firefighter about every 3rd day.

training

So, it has been awhile since i posted anything... for a bit i was posting somewhat regularly trying to get things dialed in on my weight and my training for the Seattle Half Marathon... then suddenly it happened and ski season started and life happened...
well, since then I have actually signed up for the Wenatchee marathon... my first ever marathon! I have been trying to run 18 plus miles a week and I really need to step that up, but the good news is that I have new shoes coming, so that should encourage me...
the whole weight thing? i want to be at 185 and stay there... well, this morning I hoped on the scale and it was encourging... 188... very cool.

so, i will try to keep it updated...

Feb. was a tough month... Mom tore her ACL, the kids skiied, I skiied we played, just busy busy, but we booked tickets to Hawaii! yeah baby!

Love of my life

When i get to wake up next to this beautiful girl almost everyday, i think i am blessed. she cares for me and my family. she seeks a family leader... i try... but really, she chose me, and I am so thankful for that.

parents choices....

i am almost sickened every couple of days because of the news that i keep reading... parents killing their children, small, young, innocent and full of life children. these people are fucked in the head. that is all i can say.
i am a parent of 3 kids and i love them so much, they make me so happy... sure they can be frustrating, but i want to spend time with them, i want to see the smile, i like it when they make me proud, i love to hear their stories, i just love it all!
my wife is the best mom in the world... so maybe, just maybe we should start a movement of torture for any parent that kills their child. i don't care if you are 15 or 85, respect the life of a child. don't smoke in the car with them, protect their health... your choices as a parent affects your childs future.
anyhow i do think that torture would be a good consequence for parents killing children.


on another note... weight loss and the 1/2 marathon....
i ran the 1/2 marathon, 1 hour 51 minutes and 50 seconds ish... got some burly blisters, but ran my ass off... i was tired, but it was worth it... maybe the Wenatchee Marathon in April, that would be cool. i'll keep this up, down to 192 on the scale in the mornings... but now you know one of my annoyances in life. love life, you only get one... do what you can to make people smile, that is how we should be living... not for me, but for others.....

crazy storm

so last night, i was working on some shelving for our laundry room while Wendy went to bed... it was nice and relaxing to just enjoy myself for a couple of hours of solo time in the garage. we had a mis-understanding of how they should be built, but after we got the figured out, all was good... but around 11 pm, a crazy ran/wind storm came hauling though.... it was loud and i thought for sure there would be some damage, but nothing to bad...
on another note, i ran 5 miles yesterday and this morning my shines and my left knee hurt a bit, but i am going to power through... tomorrow will be another 5 mile run for me. I am thankful for my health and my abilibity to rock while running. on the scale this morning... 190#'s, so that was awesome. I am just going to keep at it. my life is good. my wife is amazing, my children love me and my dog sleeps in the house now.
more stories later, but now i am off for the day to do some work. i pray that God will help me move some fruit! praise Jesus!

plesent Monday

Well,
i ran 5 miles today at lunch and I was exhausted when it finished... i think i need to eat about 10:30 am so I can have more food energy when I run... I finished in under 41 minutes, so that was really cool. another fun this is that on Friday i weight 191 and this morning after feasting all weeking on food and alcohol i was only 192...
my times are faster, i am starting the weight loss, etc... my brother in law is running 9:30 to 10 minute miles, so there is a chance i will be able to beat him at this half marathon thing... who know...
this weekend was very interesting for me... we went with my parents to see their boat, kind of slowed down to there speed for a few days, no kids... it made me realize how regardless of what life brings i want to be reverent in my childrens lifes.... always, that is all there is to it... anyhow, more later, but i plan on doing 5 miles on Wednesday this week and another 5 on Friday... with maybe another small one on the weekend, but it is tough always finding time and it is getting cold...
until next time.. bye